When I first started recovery and was hitting Narcotics Anonymous and Alcoholics Anonymous meetings I loved the phrase, “the wreckage of the past.” It sounded dramatic with a trace of the biblical. But, in my case, the addictions related losses I suffered were substantial and to come to terms with them and stay sober seemed insurmountable. I had major trauma issues and related symptoms of anxiety and depression. Alcohol and cocaine cost me a marriage, custody of my daughter, $250,000 and more than anything else, my dignity and self-respect. Then, in early recovery, the IRS came knocking for back taxes. Also, because of my laser-like focus on doing nothing but getting fucked up, I skipped college to tend bar. Why not? Women booze and drugs abounded there and I could make a decent buck too. At twenty-eight though, when I first got sober, tending bar had lost its luster and all I had was a high school diploma.

The wreckage was overwhelming. Was it even possible to clean it all up and lead a viable life? It didn’t feel like it, but it was. I sought out a sober and clean community and support wherever I could find it: a great therapist, group therapy, and tons of meetings, Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous. And, bit by bit things got better. I dug out of debt, dealt with the IRS, rebuilt my relationship with my daughter and went back to college, this time sticking it out until I got my degrees and started a career. I got married and had another kid. More than anything, I reveled in having a healthy family life, finally. I still do.

Why am I saying all of this? Because if you’re out there and suffering from trauma and addictions then you know despair, just like I did. Maybe you think you can’t ever have a good life, just like I thought. But you can, from wreckage to recovery. I’d like to help you find the way!