When I was younger I was lost and confused. I thought I lacked talent. I was easily frustrated. I was barely hanging on whereas other people appeared to be doing well with natural ease.

 Looking back, it’s no wonder I felt as I did. My father’s verbal abuse and occasional physical abuse butchered my self esteem and any wholesale belief I might have had in my abilities. I was depressed, anxious and full of shame. I started to self-medicate these conditions at a young age.

 It was easy to point the finger at my father and to accept things as they were, always self-medicating my negative feelings. If I were to have been honest with myself then, it would have been accurate to say I had no discipline whatsoever. I could have blamed my father for that too, and did, but doing so got me nowhere.

 At the age of twenty-eight I realized I needed to drastically change. I accepted that nobody could do it for me. I needed to commit and work at the things I wanted to accomplish daily. I understood that blaming others for my circumstances did nothing to further my cause.

 The first thing I needed to change about myself was my addictions. I had to accept that I was an addict and an alcoholic. Furthermore, that alcohol and drugs had damaged my health, diminished my ability to function and retarded my emotional growth. I knew if I continued to drink and use I would end up in prison or kill myself. How could I become someone with dignity and self respect?

 Being sober became a priority that I sought to live behind. I knew that anything else I wanted was predicated on being clean and sober. Therapy, group therapy going to meetings and accepting the teaching of others with success in recovery became paramount. I committed to doing at least one thing every day to build my stability as a sober person. The first year was a rock fight, but I stayed clean and sober. Then it got steadily easier.

 I began to look at my lack of discipline as one area that needed fixing. As I self reflected I realized that my general approach to life was sloppy and lackluster. I stayed up too late, woke up late, rushed out the door and arrived to work late and already stressed on an empty stomach. Not the kind of routine to produce success.

In part two I'll discuss the importance of how good habits applied consistently brings success!