The Injury

It’s difficult to describe what happened because I didn’t see it and it happened quickly. I sure did feel it! I was at my local Brazilian Ju-Jitsu gym and we were “rolling” or sparring. Ju-Jitsu is basically grappling. You start on your feet and the goal is to take the other guy down to the mat and then gain advantage from there. We spent a minute trying to gain a hold on each other. At some point he grabbed the collar of my Gi and started me take down. He was a really strong guy and experienced. He torqued my body forcefully over his leg for the take down but my right ankle was locked in place and received all the force and twist of his pull and the weight of both of us. I heard and felt a loud pop and then excruciating pain.

 I stayed down for about ten minutes just waiting for the acute pain to subside. A woman in the class said she heard the pop from across the room. I went briefly into shock, a bit of nausea and sweating but this passed quickly, thankfully. At first, there was minimal swelling. I could walk but with a pronounced limp. I drove home without incident but once there it ballooned up, discolored and it became difficult to put any weight on it at all. I had clients for much of the day which while difficult, did serve the purpose of distracting me from my own travails. I went to our local urgent care center first thing the next morning.

 Bottom line: a broken ankle or more specifically a “slightly displaced fracture of the distal fibula.” I may or may not need surgery, a determination an orthopedic will make when I see him next week. I have a large boot that covers all my lower leg. As luck would have it, my wife was away so suddenly everything was extra burdensome: going to the bathroom, feeding the dogs and going up and down the stairs, talking the dogs out to do their business and making something to eat. Each of things is time consuming, painful and fraught with peril (e.g. falls). 

The Psychology

How to cope? A lot is going through my mind.  How long will it take to get better? How will I get exercise? I know this sounds obsessive and I guess it is, but I feel that my mental and spiritual health in large part depend on working out. I worry about the sudden burden the injury will put on my wife. Is there any way for me to contribute to maintaining our household? I wonder if this ends my Ju-Jitsu career. Are my sixty-eight-year old bones and joints now too wonky to withstand the rigors I love to put them through? Martial arts of any kind involve injury risks. Last year’s was a boxing concussion, this year the ankle. Are the risks worth the benefits? I need to think all this over and only time will tell.

Moping and self-pity won’t heal my ankle. Even though it’s only been a few days I find myself frustrated. I’m not used to having physical limitations and it’s easy to feel sorry for myself but it’s important to keep a positive attitude. With past injuries, often I have pushed too hard too soon and made them worse and my recovery time longer. I’m aware that others have to deal with physical maladies much more dire than this, and I’m lucky to have health insurance and access to good treatment. My body has been extremely good to me. This is the first broken bone in my entire lifetime. I will need to remind myself to be grateful.

I will focus on doing what I can to heal each day. And, as one trainer told me while I had a minor injury, “do what you can.” Sure, I’ll miss running, jumping rope, grappling and hitting mitts, but I’m determined to do what I can to resume these activities as soon as I’m able. I want to be and will find a way to be a life-long athlete!